Creedence Clearwater Revival

For obvious reasons the events from last night have been on my mind a lot today. Driving home from the library a Creedence Clearwater Revival song came on the radio. A Creedence song also came on the radio the day I drove to work after meeting Tizzie and Rob for the first time. Creedence was one of the mama's favorites (she had several, but this is the only one that I actually enjoy as well), so when the song came on the radio that day AND today I just felt like she was aware of me and what's happening in my life.

I have a great family. I am so very thankful for them. I was really nervous about last night and the day hadn't started off that great, so having them there was even more amazing. I had fun last night. And I felt OK about myself ("minor" miracle!). I'm still not sure how all of this is supposed to work out, but for last night, I think it was a success.

She did say she wants to come back... :)

demise of the hoodie

Those who know me wouldn't exactly call me a clothes-horse (how's that for a word choice, Auntie?), but there is one thing I really love... hoodies. Not sure why because I rarely (if ever) actually wear the hood part of the hoodie, but I love them. I have an entire board dedicated to them on Pinterest... what else is there to say?

Today I put on my go-to hoodie, the quintessential gray zip hoodie and realized that the zipper was broken. Oh, the horror. Really. Now I have to find a new one. It doesn't necessarily have to be gray, in fact I'd really like an oatmeal colored one, but I need a new go-to hoodie. Preferably a zip up one. If I were into the peplum trend, I'd by this one in a heartbeat because I love everything above the peplum. 

So, tonight after dinner (and after I finished the Relief Society newsletter -- I do have priorities) I began my search. Kohl's, Gap, Old Navy, Anthropologie (and eBay for Anthro I could actually afford), J. Crew, Forever 21, Eddie Bauer, Express (where I found a cute lace one but it looks blasted uncomfortable!), Target... no luck. 

I did find a couple of "tide-me-overs" at Kohl's that would probably work. I could at least wear them to bed, but I'd really like to find at least one that I could wear like this...

{via}

...you know, as part of a real outfit, not just a sloppy "throw it on when I get home" type thing. I also really like this outfit... 

{via}

...even though it's not a hoodie, I might consider it (in addition) if it had the right "comfort factor."

Now, maybe I can sleep :-)

To the mama

I think of the emails we used to send each other or the notes we'd write late at night for the other to discover in the morning. I think of the extra long voicemails you'd leave that would make me frustrated beyond belief. I think of the cute notes you'd put in my lunches in elementary school and the way you would cut my sandwiches into triangles because I thought it was "cool." But mostly I think of how grateful I am to know where you are and to know I will see you again someday. If someone were to ask me what I miss the most about you I'd have to say your voice. I truly miss talking to you and hearing your voice and your laugh.

I'm sorry that I haven't been doing everything I should lately. I've gotten a little sidetracked and I hate it. I want to be better, but it's so hard to get back on track once I've gotten off.

Sometimes I feel like I can see you in my mind. I don't know if it's wishful thinking or a gift of comfort. It's not like I can see what you are doing, but I can see you are happy and I love that. I had a similar feeling when I heard that Uncle Dan had passed away. I hope you guys have gotten to hang out and maybe you're "showing him the ropes" too. For some reason that idea really comforts me. The human part of me really wishes you were here, but I know you are happier there and doing great things.

Lots of great things have been happening lately. I hope you know that. I'm sure you do because I'm sure that some of them were your "fault" - or that you helped bring them about. I love you and miss you.